@StillDrew's (Drew (Not a Guy) H) most faved Tweets...
It’s not you, it’s me. I’m the one that hates the sound of your voice & that thing you keep doing with your hair & OMG are you still here?
Following ppl in the mall and sticking gold stars on them when they say something clever. Lots of stickers left. And 2 restraining orders.
Sure, you can have my phone number. But first, what’s your Favstar rating? Oh. I see. Do you have a brother that’s funnier? Maybe a cousin?
If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you can see this, thank Al Gore.
If you can hear this, thank the LSD.
If you can see this, thank Al Gore.
If you can hear this, thank the LSD.
I asked my mom for recommendations on ways to save money. She suggested I drink less.
Anyone know of any good nursing homes?
Anyone know of any good nursing homes?
Oh, Hi Random Guy w/ the unsolicited drink in your hand. I'm going to go ahead and pass on the date rape but thanks for thinking of me.
High school classmate tracked me down. Told me her son was studying to be a mime. You know, sometimes it’s OK to be ashamed of your kids.
Stopped on my way home to buy a Christmas tree. The treadmill is full and I need something else to throw my clothes on.
Starring a RT is like sleeping with someone’s husband. Unless you also star the original. Which is like sleeping with the wife, too.
You know the problem with having an office with a window? The guy that just saw me searching my bra for the dorito I dropped down my shirt.
I am so impressionable. I see fries, I want fries. I see beer, I want beer. I see Saw VI, I want my money back.
I have a dilemma. Hot guy talking to me is very drunk. Should I let him buy me a drink now and not sleep with him or...Wait that's good.
There is breast feeding at this bar. I am disturbed and fascinated. And too drunk to stop staring. Someone please stop me from staring.
So few of my real life friends follow me on twitter. I trust that those that do know how to keep their mouths shut.
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