@angryoldcoot's (Angry Old Coot) recently faved Tweets...
I don't know what *you'd* say The Most Dangerous Game is, but I'm going with Blind-Folded Nudist Camp Pull-My-Finger.
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@WadetoBlack I'M ON A (drinking binge in the Children's Museum water feature while my kid plays with a toy) BOAT!
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I just ran up the stairs to catch the train as if I were looking forward to work. Must be the bloodlust.
Good thing the people who made up St. Patrick's Day traditions didn't get their hands on Black History Month.
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Look what I made for you. It's a crane! Well, okay, I didn't make it. I bought it. They threw in the wrecking ball. Sorry about your house.
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When threatening to kick a penguin's ass, make sure they're not out of their cage. Or armed. Or a nun.
"That comment's going to get her assassinated tomorrow." "Is tomorrow in 2 minutes?" "The way this meeting is going? Yes."
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I've been trying to nap all afternoon, but it's always "Daddy, I'm bored." "Daddy, turn on the radio." "Daddy, look out for that tree!"
"What color hair do you have Daddy?" [Pause] [Looks] "Oh yeah. Brown." Great. My daughter is a guy.
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"Daddy! At school yesterday I spelled 'science' all by myself. Wanna hear me spell it? S - I - N - S!"
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