Marijuana was my gateway drug to deciding to enjoy my life instead of killing myself

Sext: in the garden she bends down to pull a weed and her dress rises to reveal to you a doorway out of the dead end of western history

You are casting spells whether you believe you are or not. You can call it thinking if you like

Reasons I don't publicly thank for TOTDs: 1) I have no fucking idea what they are 2) I'll probably never get one 3) busy masturbating

My social media strategy is to write a bunch of stupid shit on my phone and post it to the web. So far so good

Remember when we were just an ocean of horned-up free electrons so nervous about binding together to form stars and planets and molecules?

When i was a little boy i wanted to be an army man and kill people. Now i want to be a hummingbird and have sex with other hummingbirds

We have a symbiotic relationship with a non-material being we call Language that we think we control, but it's utilizing our nervous system

The state of the world is a tragedy if you think of it as being run by angels, but if you think of it as run by monkeys, pretty amazing

*doorbell rings* it's two white libertarian males with a copy of Atlas Shrugged asking if you've heard the good news about the Free Market

Suddenly out of nowhere everything becomes possible

Yeah Obama you can have my gun, when you pry it from my beautiful hot young tight butthole ;)

When I stop looking at people as idiots I want to punch I tend to see them as suffering beings deserving compassion and miraculous mysteries

Skepticism is alot more beneficial and useful if you apply it to your own thoughts and beliefs instead of constantly projecting it outwardly

Your eyes are turning electromagnetic frequencies into light, don't get it twisted

Lol at people who don't realize they're shifting thru billions of parallel worlds every second and it's beliefs that steer the direction

The nipple is the door handle to the heart

The Buddha was right about Walmart you guys, that place sucks

A book that begins with our whole species getting kicked out of the global garden party over a drug-bust by God-as-narc and ends w dragons

Think of all the people who suffered and died to free human thought from the superstitions of the church so that we can now sext on phones